Be a Rebel Woman

The Loss of Anthony Bourdain

Uncategorized Jun 09, 2018

I'm sitting here trying to write down the racing thoughts in my head so that I feel like I have some semblance of control over the news that I woke up to today. 

Another human, adored by so many and loved by his family, succumbed to the heaviness that ended up ravaging his mind. 

When I first started following Anthony Bourdain, reading his books, listening to his interviews and watching his shows, I was instantly attracted to his authentic energy. He was real and raw, and his story was not edited to fit in. He took pride in his battle wounds and refused to censor himself. He lived life according to the basic rules of kindness, gratitude, and connection. We had a lot in common. 

I've had my own struggles with depression, which sadly, I think so many of us have had. And there was one cycle where I truly had a difficult time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel that had always guided me towards safety in the past. I reached out for help, found a treatment that worked and came through exhausted but here. 

If I had to repeat that cycle for years and years, decade after decade, I can understand where the exhaustion would become like wet cement and walking through life would be so very, very difficult.

I don't know if life will ever get 'easier'. I do know that I am getting to the age where I am experiencing loss more often and much closer to home and I've learned how precious life is and how quickly it slips away and it's scary and at the same time beautiful.

So beautiful.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255

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